Lost Perspective
by Valeria H
Summary: Edward dwells on some of the harsher areas of his life and how they are all connected to one particular phenomenon. With the help of another he manages to escape his reverie.


**Disclaimer:** I am not Hiromu Arakawa. Nor is Fullmetal Alchemist my creative genius. I only own the angsty plot and miserable mood. Obligation complete!

**Lost Perspective**

The scenery flashed past as the train approached its final destination but all was lost on the brooding teen bearing witness to it all. As his blonde locks fell into shadowed aureate eyes, one thought consumed his mind and converted the world's vast colours to grey.

It was raining.

Such a simple concept should not have bothered him. But by this point in his life, Edward knew that too many horrible memories were engraved forever in his mind by this phenomenon.

He thought of his mother; beautiful, giving, constantly waiting for one man who would never return and forever the only person that he could permit to see all that he was. She saw the loving affection that he doted his younger brother with constantly. Bore witness to the sharp anger and contempt he projected at a corrupt world he did not wish to join. But she also observed the sorrow he hid from all with his fury, the sadness of being abandoned by a once loving father, the desperate need to fill the now vacant role and the misery he felt at inflicting any kind of pain onto others. There could never be another that he would trust so explicitly and allow them to see the real Edward Elric.

He thought of a grave, one among many but in his mind unique. Rain ran in currents down its stony surface, the grass trampled around it by the part-time mourners. This was the final remnant of his mother's memory, a gloomy monument that did nothing to reveal the sunshine that she brought to his life. Words carved into its grey facade spoke of truths that he would rather not accept and were best forgotten.

**Trisha Elric**

**Loving Mother**

**Devoted Wife**

He thought of a chance, desperate and foolish, but still a fleeting vision of hope. As torrential downpour flooded the innocent remains of his childhood he clung to that light in the empty void his life had become. A mysterious woman, angry and temperamental, but also kind, saving them all simply because it was what she wished to do. He remembered his awe at her power, as the muddy earth rose to prevent the broken dam's treasured waters from washing away what was left of his life. But this did not erase the disgust that stood at its side at finding the path towards his indelible sin.

He thought of a storm, raging beyond the walls that had once provided safety, now a forgotten memory. An echo that screamed on long after he had lost the breath to do so. Blood that stained the floor would portray his arrogant story, that of Icuras, who flew too close to the sun. But what tortured him the most was not the terror but the sobbing of his kind-hearted brother who had suffered as Edward failed to release his pride. They resounded clearly in his mind, a warm flame to nurture him on his quest, an icy knife twisting in his heart, tormenting him in his sleep.

He thought of a child, a little girl who had granted him the courage to step forward on his own and pursue elusive dreams. But it was not her innocent smile or eternal optimism that fluttered behind his eyes, but the horrid creation she was reduced to, a result of a twisted mind and the unconditional love she held for her father. And still he saw it as a fate that could very well have been his own long ago.

He thought of another, the collected facade laid to waste, the stance tortured yet intimidating even when soaked to the skin. The empty mask was shattered and he could read the thoughts from that unnerving face, though the emotion that coated all meaning of those words was not something he could identify. Once mocking, now serious and fierce those words were critical, holding contempt for his agony. It urged him to get back on his feet, to accept this event as one of many that he would be forced to endure. And, gullible fool that he was at the time, he believed it, that sorrow was all that his fate had to offer him, that this agony was his lot in life.

So as the train slowed to a halt, he prepared himself to enter the cause of his suffering, to be draped in his despair. Every drop that hit his skin was another painful reminder of all that he had caused, a needle opening another wound to allow him to reminisce over his failings. While watching the rain coat all around him, Edward could only wonder what other sad tale would be added to the collection that he carried with him. However, the stoic figure that awaited him shocked him out of his reverie. Never would he have anticipated that _they_ would be waiting to greet him.

"How was your trip?"

A generic question, simple words that shouldn't have made him feel cared for, even _wanted_. But still, after seeing the other's calm mask fractured and the glimpse of a smile beneath, even a cynical creature like Edward Elric had to accept his fate. So he waited, standing in the rain he detested, causing the other to sigh at his silence.

"I'm _sure_ you must want to remove yourself from this deluge Edward. After all, you're about as fond of rain as I am."

He really couldn't help the shy smile that graced his face at that comment. The other's disgust with this variety of weather was widely known, if only because it made him feel useless. And perhaps the casual acceptance of this fate was what led him to blurt out the unforgiving truth he tried to hide.

"I suppose it's not so bad, as long as _you're_ waiting for me in it."

Leaving the wide eyed other behind him he temporarily cast aside the cold grasp of his memories, choosing to embrace the warmth that came with remembering the cast of his life, rather than the events.


End file.
